Plain Donuts by Diane Condon-boutier

Once a week, I go to a bakery. Lined up in rows are cupcakes, shortbreads, pumpkin bars, lemon cheescakes. Every week, I get the joy of picking out one special treat, my only treat for the week, and I always choose something different. Last night, it was a brownie with a chocolate fudge raspberry icing. With Irish cream coffee, of course.

So Diane's story Plain Donuts made quite an impact on me. My husband said, "Yes, that could have been you." Except, after all that studying and dreaming, I never would have picked plain. No, I would have gone for something special, perhaps one with nuts or cream filling or chocolate.

Of all the stories in the Ménage à 20 anthology, I think Plain Donuts stands out the most in my mind, not necessarily as my favorite, but as the one that haunts me. There is a hidden tale that speaks to me, reminds me of the gift life is, and calls me to enjoy the experience before me. There's wisdom in that small gesture, in appreciating, savoring, the good things we've been given.

I contacted Diane and asked her for an interview. She wrote back with some comments about what inspired the story and her own take on breakfast.

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Well, I do love to go to donut shops when I'm visiting home in the States, and I've always wondered who ordered the plain ones. Why would anyone do that? There's such an orgy of colors, flavors and unique combinations of jams and chocolat, that plain just seems inconceivable. Until one day I realized that sometimes it's not what you eat, but where you eat it, and who you're with.

You mentioned breakfast. A bowl of cereal scarfed down standing in front of the sink followed by a mug of coffee while driving to work is feeding your body: necessary but devoid of much pleasure. The same mug of coffee and bowl of rice krispies can be savored outside on the patio furniture on a sunny day with somebody you like to talk to. While all of our days aren't sunny, it sure makes you like the ones that are. And your rice krispies taste a whole lot better if you put a banana in them and smile at the person you love who's sitting next to you, talking about the day to come, or what your plans for the weekend are.

So, you can imagine all the fun you could have with exotic donuts....right? However, some people simply like the plain ones, shared with somebody special. That special person can be yourself, if you take the time to chew slowly and enjoy the flavor. Life rushes by so quickly that sometimes you forget to chew it. I know people who have indigestion of life because of that very thoughtless consumption of it. As you mentioned before, wisdom can come from enjoying your breakfast.....

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If only she were at our house, she could enjoy her breakfast with 3 children who dance about the table after every bite.

You can download this story for free by going to the Ménage à 20 site. If you would like to discuss the story with the author or with other readers, please check out the author groups on Facebook and Goodreads.

Reviewing Stories

I treasure every critical word given to me by my harshest critic, and when he actually says something good about my work, I know he really means it. Recently, I wrote a short story that will be published in the Ménage-à-20 anthology in a few weeks. As usual, I sent my editor a copy. His response?

"Did you write that?"

"Yes, of course." Why would I have sent it to him otherwise?

"I didn't know. It was too good to be yours."

What kind of answer was that? An insult or a compliment? But I was too amused to be offended.

Even though I appreciate his harsh criticism, my reviews are much different. There are two kinds of writers: the beginners who don't have a clue yet and the experienced who have studied, carefully applied their skills, and have only missed a few things. Each of these need to be critiqued in a different way.

Beginners:

"Anyone who writes is too precious to lose."
--Carlos J. Cortes

I once made the mistake of critiquing a beginner too hard, and the person almost quit writing. After that, I had two rules: (1) Never critique when I am too tired and (2) Focus on what is right more than what is wrong. My purpose is to teach new writers to critique themselves and a few tricks to improve themselves.

As a mother, I have found that telling someone what they have done right builds in them the desire to do more of that. Pointing out the character's strong voice helps new writers dig deeper into POV and keep element strong. Finding the spot with the most showing (dramatization) and then explaining why you admire that section is more useful than saying, "You're doing to much telling." This is called constructive praise, so much more helpful than "Good job."

After that, I will give a few pointers, areas that need a bit of work, things like, "Watch your verb tense" or "Stay in character." Constructive criticism--another means of teaching.

Experienced Writers

However, when I critique an experienced writer, I'm not trying to teach or encourage. My purpose is to respond honestly to the story that I've read. As with the critique of a beginner, this will include what I like and what I don't, and I will try to do so constructively.

But my focus is now different, for I am ultimately responding to the work of art rather than to the author.

Recommended Reading

Several other bloggers have written on this topic. If you want to read some more, check out these articles:

What is good? by Patricia C. Wrede

Accepting and Giving Reviews on the blog Canines, Equines, Aliens, and Felines

Reviewing Book Reviewers by D.B. Pacini

Take Your Criticism Like a Pro, Words of Wisdom by Kate Quinn

Short Story Review: Smooth Criminal by Roy L. Pickering

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This twisted and perverse story Smooth Criminal by Roy L. Pickering completely took me by surprise, delighting me with its sudden and suspenseful ending. Brilliantly told. I think Pickering handled the tale masterfully.

A.J. comes home from work early to find her in bed with another man. He does what many men would do: murders both wife and lover. But then there is the cover up and the alibi and the twists and turns that go with a passionate murder. But Pickering has more in store than an ordinary murder with an ordinary ending.

Short Story Review: Baen's Universe Articles

A friend of mine sent me these Baens-Universe articles, written by Tony Frazier. From a writer's perspective, I am impressed with the tone of voice that emanates from the narrator, a retired superhero with an attitude problem. The story is written in first-person present tense, which gives the story a very powerful impact.

Astromonkeys, is the retelling of how Digger and Astro save the day when these nasty, green space monkeys attacked. Sounds ridiculous, doesn't it? But the way the tale is told--with Digger sitting at the bar with a friend of his, explaining to the barmaid why promises must be kept--the reader gets easily sucked into Digger's sassy, disrespectful account of the events.

Double-Secret Weapon starts with Digger signing fan-pics at a mall when Professor Pierce, an evil-doer who throws needles, shows up in line to beg him to let him be on the show. There's nothing Digger could do, even if he wanted to It's a world where superheroes are reduced to the role of Hollywood heroes. Here's an excerpt:

Another picture slides in front of me, a little blond kid, about the same age as the last one, staring at me with big, round eyes. His mother nudges him. "Tell him your name, honey," she says.

"Darren. I really like your show," the kid says, "And my favorite character is Dig-Dog."

Jesus wept. Of all the things I hate about The Digger Family Amazing Power Hour, and there are several, the one I hate most is the extended family they've saddled me with: Kid Digger and Daisy Digger and Uncle Digger and the Three Lieutenant Diggers: Ditch, Posthole and Grave. But the worst, the absolute worst, is the Mighty Dig-Dog, mainly because he's the real hero of the show. They play me as a big buffoon, always getting in over my head until Dig-Dog comes in to save the day. Bastard.

But I try to keep a smile on my face as I write on the picture. I hand it back and say, "He's my favorite, too." Smiling makes my face hurt.

These two stories are excellent entertainment but also are good examples of writing with voice.

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Other topics on voice:
style and voice

Short Story Review: The Power Factory blog by Jonathon Munn

I've been enjoying these short stories by Jonathon Munn that he posts on his blog The Power Factory. They are easy reads and very intriguing. Some are a little creepy, but all of them have an element of mystery that keeps you reading until the end.

All four stories (so far) are well-dramatized. You experience the strange events as the main character does. He does a good job of setting the scene, creating a mystery, and revealing the answers piece by piece. And each story is better than the one before. So you'll get to watch the writer grow as he adds another story every week.

Review: Jam by Roy L. Pickering Jr.

On his blog, Roy L. Pickering Jr. wrote Jam, a short story about a middle-aged man getting laid off from the job he had held for years. My feelings about this story are rather mixed up. I liked it, but I felt that the author could have adjusted a few things to make it even better.

Throughout the story, Floyd does a lot of self-reflection, remembering his youthful zeal for adventure and his dreams of a wondrous future that were never fulfilled. The woman, who was at his side as he ventured out into the world, has left him, rejecting him for being too passive. The job that was supposed to be his ticket to success betrayed him, dumping him for younger blood. His youthful passion has drifted away as the toils of life have sucked him dry.

The thing that made me want to write a review of this story was the ending. Although I don't want to give it away, I have to say that it is the ending that makes this story worthwhile. It was a bit jarring and unexpected. The character didn't seem the type to respond in this fashion. He had seemed so mopey throughout the story. But I know that, when everything is going wrong and the world is set against me, there is only one way that I respond, and that is exactly what Floyd did. I recommend reading this story just for that moment, when Floyd responds to the whole situation at the very end.

Last December, I was laid off from my job of 10 years. It was an awful experience, training my incompetent replacements, and I left the place bitter and angry but at the same time oh so thankful to finally be free of that oppressive environment. So in many ways, I identified with the character's situation. But Pickering should have played up the drama a little more. There was so much more he could have said and done to draw the reader in a little deeper.

I felt that Pickering was in his character's head too much. There was very little showing and a lot of telling, like when he went to the office and his old coworkers ignored him. Pickering talks about them ignoring Floyd, but instead, he could have had Floyd tell a joke to lighten the mood or say farewell. It would have made his invisibility more poignant, and it would have set us, the readers, into the scene rather than just in the character's head.

In conclusion, I would give this story 3.5 stars.