I am not a Scrooge. I am not Grinch. I love Christmas--the cookies, the tree, the presents, the lights, the miracles, the Christmas story--but I hate the music. Over the last few years, I've noticed that there are hundreds of remakes of the same few songs, and everybody competes on who can sing the prettiest.
If I have to listen to one more "Walking in a Winter Wonderland" or "Silver Bells," I'm going to scream. The only music I have enjoyed in the last 10 years is the Transiberian Orchestra, a symphonic metal group that performs Christmas music.
So I propose a Christmas contest: original Xmas poetry that has a fresh perspective or a parody of an old song. Anything to breathe new life on the Christmas spirit!
Here's the rules:
1. The competition is open to a Christmas poetry or musical parody.
2. Submit as many entries as you want.
3. All entries must be in English, original, unpublished, and not submitted or accepted elsewhere at the time of submission. CYA maneuver.
4. To enter the contest, post a comment with your entry and then email me your mailing address to email@example.com along with an author's bio. In case you win, I'll need this to send you your prize and to post some information about you.
5. Entries must be submitted by midnight Friday, December 25, 2009.
6. I will choose several of my favorite entries and allow readers to vote to determine the winners. Voting will start Tuesday, December 29, 2009, and run to midnight Tuesday, January 5, 2010.
7. Winners will be announced on this blog shortly thereafter.
8. The first-prize winner will be determined by the entry with the most votes. The winner will receive a the latest Transiberian Orchestra's album Night Castle, as well as free publicity by having the winning entry and author's bio posted on my blog.
9. The runner-ups will be determined by any entry that I enjoyed but did not receive the top votes. All runner-ups will have free publicity by having their entry and author's bio posted on my blog.